Know what? I'm in love with like everything sappy and sad in the World. It's so masochistic. It's like I know it's gunna make me cry over and over again but that doesn't phase my resolution or even come up to mind that it's going to be a problem after that. Blame it on visceral impulses.
It's like... Sappy songs which listening to it over and over again can cause one to cry. Soaps which never fail to make me ever so sad. I even burn the whole day finishing whole series. For today Kurokami The Animation, it ends with the scene of a guy having his wedding with the childhood friend and him, on his deathbed, aged with a full mane of white hair facing the sunset, after his final words telepathically through 1 final syncronisation, he passes on with the scene of his grandchildren calling him to dinner.
Keita: Kuro, that's enough now. I'll take the curse with me, my life has been nothing but bliss. Thank You.
Kuro: Thank goodness. Keita has always... Thank you. Rest in peace, my contractee.
Kuro, on her self imposed seclusion starts tearing and said to herself those words. I know it doesn't exactly have anything to do with me but it just pains me so much. Yes I know it doesn't make sense to you who's reading but hey I'm crying here so let me be. It's just damn touching because they both were "watashi no taisetsunamono" , my most important person, to each other through everthing they faced.
So let me ask you. I know we all should pick the better choice. Leading a successful life and blissfully retiring. But I pick the other even if it leads me to be a pauper because I'm with the one 1 love most. That's what being the most important to me means. I just have a very Japanese orientated, sucker girl mentality. What would you choose?
Just having my little moment now for the people who's not in my life, even after trying my best.
Sin†ner™
Do not wonder,
For I am but a shadow
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